Let's Learn to Speak Texan: Texas Grammar and Its Fascinating Peculiarities
In Texas, they have a special relationship with the word "mighty" (powerful, strong). It is used as an all-purpose adverb in phrases such as "mighty pretty" (very pretty), "mighty ugly" (very ugly), "mighty expensive" (very expensive), and so on.
The word "might" is also very popular and is used instead of "maybe." Instead of saying, "Maybe I can help you Sunday," they say, "I might could help you on Sunday." The word "might" is combined with other verbs to create an impressive range of options for conditional expressions such as "might could," "might better," "might oughta," "might've used to," and even the steroidal conditional "might woulda had oughta."
Taken out of context, these phrases may sound strange or even incorrect, but in conversation they come alive and seem perfectly normal. It is important to note that Texas is a diverse state with different dialects, so not all of these conjugations are common. Some are, others are not.
Many Texans would never use this folksy way of speaking, but there are also those who prefer its simple usefulness. And there are those who would never speak this way at work but slip into these comfortable rhythms at home. Some of us speak two dialects.
Might Could
Let's begin with the expression "might could." It is often used in response to a question:
"Would you go with me to the movies Friday night?" "Might could." ("Would you go with me to the movies Friday night?" "Maybe I could.")
"You figure you can fix the starter on my truck?" "Might could." ("Do you think you can fix the starter on my truck?" "Maybe I could.")
Might Would Better
The expression "might would better," which I used to hear among oil workers in my younger years, has considerable charm. It is most often used as a command. You will occasionally hear it in Westerns:
"Sheriff, you might would better think long and hard 'fore you pick up that gun." ("Sheriff, you'd better think long and hard before you reach for that gun.")
Or you can use it as a self-regulating suggestion when thinking aloud:
"Well, I might would better get on to bed. Long day tomorrow." ("Well, I'd better get to bed. Tomorrow will be a long day.")
"Might would better" is also a future conditional verb referring to something that might be done differently in the near future:
"On second thought, I think they might would better drive on down here Friday night." ("On second thought, I think they'd better drive all the way down here Friday night.")
Might Oughta
"Might oughta" is often used when shaking one's head over poor decisions:
"She might oughta thought about those bills before she quit a job without havin' another." ("Maybe she should have thought about those bills before quitting her job without having another one.")
"He might oughta known not to tease a rattlesnake, especially with a short stick." ("Maybe he should have known not to tease a rattlesnake, especially with a short stick.")
Might Have Used To
For an uncertain recollection, we have "might have used to":
"I might have used to stay there when I was in Dallas, but I can't say for certain." ("I may have stayed there when I was in Dallas, but I can't say for certain.")
Might Woulda Had Oughta
And here is the mighty king of the conditional: "might woulda had oughta." It works like building a tower out of blocks—you add one verb to another and then a third, until you end up with a long chain like 'might woulda had oughta' (might should have). It is like a game—how many auxiliary verbs can you string together in one sentence? "Might woulda had oughta" is far beyond the boundaries of standard English.
When my wife, an English professor and proud member of the grammar police, hears such verbal anarchy, she wants to call in the SWAT team. But I find the expression "might woulda had oughta" admirably creative. It is like watching LeBron James fly toward the basket and spin in midair for a reverse dunk between two defenders. Magic.
In redneck culture, it is convenient grammar:
"They might woulda had oughta sold that house about ten years ago before it fell apart on 'em." ("Maybe they should have sold that house about ten years ago before it fell apart on them.")
Used To Could
The famous Southern linguist Jeff Foxworthy pointed out how useful the expression "used to could" is in Southern speech. For example, when people ask, "Do you dance?" some reply, "Used to could." ("I used to be able to.")
"Used to could" is often used when stringing verbs together. It is frequently preceded by "might have":
"You know how to program the TV remote?" "Might have used to could, but not anymore." ("Do you know how to program the TV remote?" "Maybe I used to be able to, but not anymore.")
See? It saves you from unwanted work. Here is another instructive example:
"Can you tune up my '98 GMC Z-71?" "Well, I might have used to could, but I'm mighty doubtful about it now." ("Can you tune up my 1998 GMC Z-71?" "Well, maybe I used to be able to, but now I very much doubt it.")
This Texas grammar is a fascinating example of how language evolves naturally and how different communities develop their own comfortable ways of expressing themselves, which may sound unusual but make perfect sense within the context of their culture.
